I'm sure I'm not the first one to think of this, but I'm the first one that I know of, so I'm taking credit for it. This is an adaptation of a fun parlor game that I invented called "How Gay Are You?" (although I'm pretty sure that if you've ever used the word "parlor" without the word "funeral" in front of it, you don't need me to tell you that you're gay. And no, I'm not gay, but I am the son of two English professors, a union which produces a special kind of freak). The idea is, you throw out the names of two celebrities, one of the same sex and one of the opposite sex, and ask, "Which one are you more attracted to?" The fun is to come up with progressively more attractive members of the same sex and progressively less attractive members of the opposite sex, until your victim finally cracks and has to call their mom to break the news. So here are 10 questions designed to determine your gayness. If you're a woman, you should really start at the other end of the list and work your way up, if you know what I mean. Give yourself a point every time you pick someone of the same sex as you. And if you find yourself thinking, "Well, I would pick x, but he/she has a really horrible personality," score the question in the "gay" column if you are a male, because straight men could give a crap about personality. And don't be lulled into a false sense of security by the fact that the first few questions are no-brainers. Everyone breaks eventually.Feel free to steal this for your own blog; just give me a shout out if you would be so kind. And please don't go into graphic detail in your comments here, as this is a family-oriented blog. Thanks.
Are you more attracted to...
1. Halle Berry or Dennis Hastert?
2. Scarlett Johansson or Woody Allen?
3. Uma Thurman or Dennis Franz?
4. Sarah Jessica Parker or Billy Bob Thornton?
5. Rene Zellweger or Steve Buscemi?
6. Courtney Love or Will Ferrell?
7. Hillary Clinton or Owen Wilson?
8. Sandra Bernhardt or Charlie Sheen?
9. Whoopie Goldberg or Ashton Kutcher?
10. Janet Reno or Brad Pitt?
Results
0 You're in serious denial. Nobody is that straight.
1-2 You're either a good liar, or ridiculously straight. Congrats, either way.
3-4 Safely in "don't ask, don't tell" territory.
5-7 I hate to tell you this, but your friends already know.
8-9 Wow, you're pretty gay.
10 You're just trying to upset your parents. Give it a rest.
Labels: Quizzes
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